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Lex
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Mon Jun 25, 2012 8:54 am Posts: 13792 Location: Stratford
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What do you call a donkey with 3 legs?
A wonky.
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| Sat Jan 11, 2020 12:11 pm |
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rebbonk
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Thu Oct 12, 2017 6:10 pm Posts: 9272 Location: Coventry
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What do you call a man with no arms in a pool?
Bob
_________________ Of course it'll fit, you just need a bigger hammer.
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| Sat Jan 11, 2020 4:47 pm |
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Lex
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Mon Jun 25, 2012 8:54 am Posts: 13792 Location: Stratford
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2 parrots on a perch.
1 says: 'Can you smell fish?'
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| Sat Jan 11, 2020 7:01 pm |
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rebbonk
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Thu Oct 12, 2017 6:10 pm Posts: 9272 Location: Coventry
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There's two fish in a tank.
One turns to the other and says 'You man the guns, I'll drive'.
_________________ Of course it'll fit, you just need a bigger hammer.
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| Sat Jan 11, 2020 8:26 pm |
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Lex
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Mon Jun 25, 2012 8:54 am Posts: 13792 Location: Stratford
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What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh.
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| Sat Jan 11, 2020 11:39 pm |
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rebbonk
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Thu Oct 12, 2017 6:10 pm Posts: 9272 Location: Coventry
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My mate David has lost his ID
I'll just call him Dav
_________________ Of course it'll fit, you just need a bigger hammer.
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| Sun Jan 12, 2020 10:24 am |
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margaret
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Text Shorthand For Mature Members ATD - At the Doctors BTW - Bring the wheelchair BYOT - Bring your own teeth FWIW - Forgot where I was IMHO - Is my hearing aid on? GGPBL - Gotta go, pacemaker battery low ROFLACGU - Rolling on floor laughing and can't get up TTYL - Talk to you louder . 
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| Wed Jan 15, 2020 5:32 pm |
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rebbonk
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Thu Oct 12, 2017 6:10 pm Posts: 9272 Location: Coventry
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No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
_________________ Of course it'll fit, you just need a bigger hammer.
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| Wed Jan 15, 2020 10:49 pm |
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Lex
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Mon Jun 25, 2012 8:54 am Posts: 13792 Location: Stratford
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I used to work in shoe recycling.
It was sole destroying.
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| Sat May 09, 2020 3:55 pm |
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margaret
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Here's one on the back of the Bran cereal packet. Fun Fact.
Did you know.... Astronauts from Apollo 11 ate cereal in space . It was mixed with fruit and packed into cubes but couldn't be eaten with milk in case it floated out of the bowl!
Sound crazy!
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| Sat May 09, 2020 4:19 pm |
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rebbonk
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Thu Oct 12, 2017 6:10 pm Posts: 9272 Location: Coventry
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My blonde wife and I got into an argument because I accused her of being stupid.
Eventually, she jumped up out of her seat and yelled, "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't walk out of that door!"
I replied, "The plane hasn't landed yet."
_________________ Of course it'll fit, you just need a bigger hammer.
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| Sat May 09, 2020 9:26 pm |
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rebbonk
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Thu Oct 12, 2017 6:10 pm Posts: 9272 Location: Coventry
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A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails.
When the police show up, they ask him what happened.
The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
_________________ Of course it'll fit, you just need a bigger hammer.
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| Sun May 24, 2020 12:10 pm |
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Shizara
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Thu Apr 20, 2006 7:45 pm Posts: 2334 Location: Nuneaton
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What did one tonsil say to the other tonsil?
Put on your hat and coat, the doctor's taking us out.
_________________Cool 
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| Mon May 25, 2020 9:21 am |
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rebbonk
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Thu Oct 12, 2017 6:10 pm Posts: 9272 Location: Coventry
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What has 400 legs and only 6 teeth?
The queue outside Asda in Newport this morning
_________________ Of course it'll fit, you just need a bigger hammer.
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| Mon May 25, 2020 2:46 pm |
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Shizara
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Thu Apr 20, 2006 7:45 pm Posts: 2334 Location: Nuneaton
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Why did the rabbit cross the road?
To get to the other side but, why did the chicken cross the road?
It was the rabbit's day off.
_________________Cool 
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| Mon May 25, 2020 9:57 pm |
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Lex
Pillar of the Community
Joined: Mon Jun 25, 2012 8:54 am Posts: 13792 Location: Stratford
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
For some fowl reason.
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| Sun Jun 07, 2020 9:19 pm |
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