I am throwing in my hat first....

[cathidaw]

At long last I am about to contribute once more to WOL ...if I may after lapsing for so long.
The fact that the past few years have been difficult for me is no excuse but it's the only one I have-so here I am.
I have had 2 ankle replacements since I last wrote-and frankly could not be bothered. ---With daily life as it was, even though I have been lucky.A bit of news last week has knocked me back a bit but I have kicked myself hard and hope I can cope with the fact that one of my ankles have failed and 'something has to be done' I'll know next Thursday. Problem is -no driving for 6 months after op..and I've just bought a camper van again after 8 years with a car...

what's new?
oNE NEW gRANDSON
ONE NEW GREAT GRANDSON.
ONE DAUGHTER MARRIED.
Luck with nuneaton arts festival in photography and writing-so I MUST HAVE MADE A LITTLE EFFORT.

NOT NEW?
oNE GARDEN GROWING MORE JUNGLE LIKE..with a series so called gardeners who don't appear to like gardening..
A curtain fitter who doesn't like fixing curtain poles,
and a garden 'slabber' with a bad back.

I MISSED YOU ALL.

[Lex]

Welcome back Cathi! I, for one, have missed you. Looks like you've had a really busy time of it. Congratulations on all your good news, and may I offer you my sympathies on your not-so-good news. Hope you get on the road of getting your ankle sorted on Thursday.

[rebbonk]

Get stuck in Cathidaw, you can let it all out here.

Sounds a bit 'off' about your ankle, please do keep us informed. Meanwhile, take care.

[Gladys]

Welcome Cathidaw, sorry to hear about the failed ankle op. If it is any consolation, I had a failed Carpel Tunnel op that made it worse than before surgery. I was hence very reluctant to let any surgeon try again but eventually did and thankfully, this time it was a success. Just make sure you get the credentials of the surgeon and he or she is actually the best. My first op was through a NHS contracted company which after the event were investigated. I was not the only problem but one of several failed ones. The 2nd op was through the NHS surgeon who was appointed to investigate these failures and she is a real specialist. Check out who did yours , who is going to do the next if you agree to it and if they are OK.

[Shizara]

Hello! My turn to have lapsed and return again and I step in here to see our much loved Cathidaw has returned. Are we all present and correct now?

Cathi, you have had quite a time of it. I looked at your lists and thought.. Crikey and like all the positives but the other list:

NOT NEW?
oNE GARDEN GROWING MORE JUNGLE LIKE..with a series so called gardeners who don't appear to like gardening..
A curtain fitter who doesn't like fixing curtain poles,
and a garden 'slabber' with a bad back.

I sometimes say I miss not having a garden and it's true, I enjoyed growing things, but in today's world, with the shifts that I work I don't think I would have time anymore though there is something therapeutic about pottering in your own bit of garden.

[cathidaw]

Are we all present and correct---I love that, Shizara and feel I belong again.
I love my garden but am not a proper gardener.I reluctantly plant stuff and hope it grows. No bedding plants-too much bother-But the garden looks ok to me.
3 years ago a lady in my art class-(Istill do that) gave me a bag of dalhia corms with strict instructions to plant carefully and lift at the end of the year.I thanked her thinking -blow that for a game.They came up spindly and then died off, poor things.Then heigho ---this year they surprised me with a -ner-ner and a beautiful glut of red single flowers which keep multipying.I just go round and cut off the dead heads. Easy.
Still haven't got my curtain rail up but hopefully next week...same with my hedge.Promise-promises.
Thinking of getting a sheep!for the lawns.

[cathidaw]

Continuing with my garden.
One of the men who allowed his dog to mess up my pavement, came over to speak this week when I was in the garden.
I was pleased-thought he held an olive twig 'and I had a new best friend'
A few moments of chat, then,"Tharr 'edge looks like it needs a trim (great understatement there) I agreed,saying "Mmm".
"Can't see the name o' the road " he said.
I told him the name of the road - (o.k I was facetious -he lives in it)
"Wonder the council ain't been down and said you gorra cut it" I was annoyed at this busy bodying but only smiled, saying I liked it like that, nice and green.
He said 'but nobody can see the sign".I said he was welcome to trim around it if he liked but assured him I'd get it done over the next week or so.
He went off, happy, prominently clasping his blue poop bag.
So he's my NBF--for the present!
The hedge gets cut this week-I hope.

ps. Changed my mind about sheep.My N B F may not like it and if someone left the gate open they would perhaps end up in someones freezer.

[Gladys]

Haha- Cathidaw. Your wonderful dry approach is just the ticket. I would suggest not getting the sheep either and also because they may well end up as you say. I had a ' to do' with a 'New ' neighbor recently. Well, she isn't new as new suggests. She's the Mother of the lady who lives in the house and has moved in and taken over the household like true battle axes do. The original lady whom I have never had any problems with but have exchanged polite ' Hellos' over the years seems so down since and is growing larger by the day which suggests a great deal of misery to me. Now back to the situation with the battle axe Mother. I have a hanging basket watering routine that hasn't changed in 10 years. I go round in a certain direction of the garden and end up at the last basket at about 6pm each summers evening. The baskets on our 6 foot fence dividing their garden from ours are what have caused the issue. I was happily spraying (not with great gusto) the said baskets having begun in the other part of the garden when the woman yelled at me that I was so rude and was wetting her. It appears she'd taken up residence on the other side of the fence which being 6 feet high I wouldn't know. This is what I told her to which she told me to use a step ladder. (I'm just 4'9 and a half inch tall) Her shrieking continued to a crescendo at which I told her to avoid speaking to me at all. Her caterwauling went on and on so I stopped her with ' Do you know what?' answer ' what?' My reply ' You really are an old bat. Go and be a fishwife somewhere else' Squeals ensued and on the phone to her Grand daughter she got. That may have been a step too far but I had had enough and a bully to me she will not be! Since this episode which stopped the other neighbors her side and mine, I have been congratulated on my lack of swearing and management of this bully whom they have all had issues with which I didn't know. I now don't feel guilty and I continue to water my baskets as I always have done.

[rebbonk]

Gladys, the expression I would have used would be a "vinegared fishwife!"

[cathidaw]

I hate confrontations and I think people take advantage if they can with people like that.. but I find an 'innocent' faceitiousness helpful, and I have a soft voice.
My N B F will be happy on Wednesday when the hedge man comes. I wonder what his next move will be.

[rebbonk]

Neighbours can be a pain in the a***.

I'm lucky, I have 2 good sets of neighbours and only 1 of the a***h*** type. But as you say Cathidaw, people will take advantage if they can.

I don't really want to escalate the situation with my bad neighbours, because my understanding is that if I do and then try to sell my house, I have to declare it on the pre sales forms, and that might put prospective buyers off.

[Gladys]

Thank You all for your support. I hate confrontation too but in this instance it was an unavoidable and entirely necessary requirement. It really is strange because since that episode some 6 or 7 weeks ago, the old bat has remained within the house and its garden. Her daughter and her visiting grown up children come and go as normal but the battle axe manoeuvres have stopped. There have been so many of those since she took up residence that I now understand some of the 'issues ' experienced by the other neighbors. Example 1 = spraying their fences with an orangey coloured fence paint which killed the neighbors veg patch and ruined their patio furniture, soiling the patio window as it was freely flung into the air with much abandon and next to no care ! ( It leaked through our side on that 6' fence but I said nothing at the time because of said confrontational issues) Those neighbors have since said they will now not keep their silence if anything happens again. Example 2 = The Battle Axe in her 'sweetening ' of her Daughter booked and paid for a 3 week holiday to Greece for the two of them. They asked another neighbor to look after the 2 cats in the household. Diligently, this neighbor attended to them morning and evening until after 5 days into the holiday she opened the front door to find the kitchen ceiling fallen through and pouring water from a pipe upstairs. She called me and together we turned power and water off (once we could find the stop cock which had been buried) Through my children who do the Facebook thing they located her son who was able to contact her son and so they were alerted to the problem at home and insurers could be contacted. We also got a plumber for them to make the place safe in the interim. Between us we did the decent thing and cleared most of the rubble after pictures were taken and sent so they didn't have this to face on their return. Once they did, they made no attempt to offer Thanks to me and next to none for the neighbor who'd been tasked with looking after the moggies. ( 1 40 gram packet of tobacco was donated to her. ) Hence this year there hasn't been any holiday making by them as it seems they have exhausted the good neighborly scheme.

[rebbonk]

There are two sorts of people in this world, givers and takers. In my experience the latter outnumber the former by at least 2:1.

[Gladys]

Rebbonk, I have to agree. In this case, I actually feel sorry for the woman of the Battle Axe. It seems she's succumbed to the carrot of her mortgage etc being paid off by her Mother but is paying a bitter price for the privilege. She has no friends and her life is now about her Mother's dictates and needs. As a woman in her middle forties, she is like an old lady with largesse increasing her obvious health issues. I know what you say about declaring neighborly problems with house sales but in this case, I haven't had issues with her only her Mother and only on the one occasion so it wouldn't be too difficult to scout around that one.

Now, how do I tackle the issue of the displaced fence? These people had a patio laid about 4 months ago and the contractors displaced a fence post which is sheared off leaving the two panels either side hanging in the wind. The line of the fence has moved and they are about 4 inches into our domain from that point. That contractor laid a path and put shingle down either side which has spilled into our garden under the fence line. This is an awful nuisance when mowing especially. I have said nothing on any of this thus far. However, I have a contractor repairing the post and the line but it will mean moving their offending slab back about 4 inches which will probably impact on their patio. Crikey, I am not looking forward to that one.

[cathidaw]

Hi Gladys, I had a fence problem once here.At the top of my garden, the people backing on had a new fence fitted between theirs and their next door neighbours.The panels were 6' long so concrete posts were installed to accommodate 7 panels They reached 3" over on to my garden.My newish fence was pushed back and my panels pinged off leaving 2 flapping.
I told the people and the husband said "sorry too bad it's done now" and shut the door.I was flabbergasted, and as I said, dislike confrontation.At the time we had a pet goose,Heidi who was forever trying to get out of her patch of garden often trotting up the road if she could. My daughter said she was eyeing the gap. I let her out - and my goodness how quickly she made for the gap. I went around to the house with 2 of my children, and asked politely if we could have our goose back.
He went mad at me but soon realised that his immaculate garden was in danger of being trashed..-Have you seen the mess a goose can make with their big feet and the rate they pull up plants?
I was very soft in those days and agreed that if he repaired my fencing properly he could have the 3" of ground he'd pinched.That was it,-but one day 2 months later Heidi died.The vet said she'd died broody or of a broken heart because she didn't like being cooped up. (She had half a garden to herself) and we'd had her for 6 years.And we;d found bread in her patch which must have been thrown over, we all cried buckets.
.Not saying you need a goose Gladys but discuss it with the neighbours, asking for suggestions. and if they wont understand, lay the slabs you need and block the gaps.. You will be panicky as I would be but if I don't do the right thing I hate myself for being a coward.and I am--inside,( not saying you are a coward) just too nice for your own good.

[Gladys]

Dear Cathidaw, Your poor Heidi and you and the children. One can only imagine.... cr**ar***ts. Well, I rather think speaking to them on an negotiating stance is now out of time. I will tell them I have a fence person coming to fix the problem. All I know from them is that they will worry that the stain I spray or they as inconvenienced will have to spray and this will affect their order. ( These are people who when you mow, then rush out to mow, if you put up solar lights then they do as well etc etc.) Sad, isn't it? I now avoid mowing and leave it to the last moment before it looks so awful. I wait now until the Daughter is at work. I don't do the ' One upmanship - Keep up with the Jones' ' It seems they do.