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Thread: Daily life over the garden fence chat.

  1. #113
    Administrator Lex's Avatar
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    Is it me, or are even fewer butterflies filttering around than ever this year?

  2. #114
    Super Moderator rebbonk's Avatar
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    Can't say I've seen many Lex. But it's still early.

  3. #115
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    I've seen a few around the garden. Small blues, and brimstones . But no peacocks, or red admirals, or orange tips yet, maybe later in the summer.

  4. #116
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    Spotted a tortoiseshell and a meadow brown butterfly flitting about, while gardening today.

  5. #117
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    I was enjoying a well earned pint in the beer garden of my local this evening (after a long afternoon on the allotment), when a tortoiseshell landed on my shirt. It was really nice to just watch it sit there & enjoy the sun for a moment before it flittered off.

  6. #118
    Super Moderator rebbonk's Avatar
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    Saturday night and I'd just settled down to watch Taggart, when she who casts no shadow says, "It needs attention you know!"

    "Eh," I says. "What are you talking about my little piranha fish?"

    "The kitchen sink. It's blocked."

    "It wasn't when I used it earlier."

    "Well it is now you useless lump!" (Abbreviated version, you understand.)

    So I wandered into the kitchen, ran the tap it it all went down the plughole as expected. I gently relayed this to the long haired general who was now curled up with the dog.

    "You need to go outside to see it, you useless man!"

    So I went outside, and sure enough the drain was exhibiting a slight overflow.

    "I'm not looking at that now, I'll do it tomorrow," I said.

    "Bl**dy bone idle you are."

    I sat back down with her glowering at me.

    Sunday morning, I walked the dog, fed him, did the washing up, put the meat in, and then decided that the drain ought be tackled. Looking for a used rubber glove, I couldn't find one, so ripped open a new packet. Outside and into the drain I ventured.

    My arm seemed to go deeper into the drain than I remembered it doing last time. (Yes, last time when she poured some chemical down that set like plaster of paris.) The glove wasn't long enough and horrible greasy, oily, waste water flooded over the top and into the glove itself. The experience wasn't pleasant, I can tell you.

    Finally, reaching the bottom of the drain I felt something soft. Thoughts of Spencer dropping dead animals in there briefly crossed my mind before I reminded myself that there was a cover on it to stop such things. Taking a deep breath I grabbed whatever it was and withdrew my arm.

    There was a sudden suction as the water started disappearing at a great rate of knots. I wasn't sure if I was going to be sucked into the swirling vortex. But struggling against the current I dragged my arm, hand and booty out. Looking into my hand was the largest fur-ball I'd ever seen.

    Yes, it was hair belonging to the former member of the Waffen SS, from where she'd washed her hair in the kitchen sink.

    On eventually rising from her pit, I told her what I'd done and what had caused the problem. The words she uttered will haunt me forever....

    "You swine, you've used my marigolds. I'll need to get some new ones this afternoon!"
    Last edited by rebbonk; 09-07-2017 at 04:13 PM.

  7. #119
    Administrator Lex's Avatar
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    Ye Gods; damned f you do, damned if you don't Rebbonk!

  8. #120
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    About time we had something amusing on this site.

    Can you better this one?

    or lets SEE A GOOD JOKE OR SAYING.

    My Dad was full of funny sayings. One of his favourites we used to beg him NOT to tell-for the FORTY FIFTH TIME time was,

    "I knew the bus driver was Irish because he had a shamrock in his turban."

    Or in a strange pub, we'd cringe when he would sometimes ask the landlord,
    "Is there a brook near here landlord?"
    If there was, he'd hold up his glass and say, "I thought so sir."
    All in his polite Oxford accent.
    Last edited by cathidaw; 10-07-2017 at 10:43 PM.

  9. #121
    Super Moderator rebbonk's Avatar
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    I'm outside talking to the neighbour having left a timed dish in the oven.

    The timer starts bleeping and the neighbour says, "Sounds like your smoke alarm again, you'd better go and see to it."

    I nearly died of embarrassment. I'm always using the timer and don't have a kitchen smoke alarm.

    Nice to know what the neighbours think!

  10. #122
    Super Moderator rebbonk's Avatar
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    She did it again last night! I'd just settled to watch Taggart with a large brandy when she says, "The washing machine won't fix itself you know!"

    "Eh? What are you talking about woman?"

    "The fabric conditioner isn't going through."

    Fortunately, it was only a blocked water feed that took me a few seconds to clear. But I really do wish she'd stop expecting me to be telepathic. - You'd think after 26 odd years she'd know that I'm not.

  11. #123
    Administrator Lex's Avatar
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    After suffering toothache for a few weeks, I finally decided to go to the dentist yesterday and get it looked at. After a couple of minutes poking around and a quick x-ray, she said that there's nothing she could do to save the offending tooth, as it had split down to the root.

    So she booked me in today to have my tooth whipped out. At lunchtime, I walked back into the surgery with a mild sense of dread and visions of huge amounts of pain. The only pain I experienced, though, was when my dentist stuck the anaesthetic-loaded syringe into the root of my bad tooth; after that I didn't feel a thing!

    Now the drugs are starting to wear off, I'm starting to feel a dull ache where my tooth was, but other than that I've had no side effects apart from sounding like the Elephant Man due to a numb tongue & facial muscles!

  12. #124
    Super Moderator rebbonk's Avatar
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    I am of the firm opinion that only going to the dentist when in pain is the correct strategy for me. Like you, Lex, I had a tooth that was cracked all the way down into the root. But my dentist suggested that he might be able to fix it with root canal work.

    I asked how much and nearly choked when he said 200. I then asked about the chances of success and he reckoned 50/50. He seemed mightily put out when I said, "Take it out!" No pain at all and the gum healed over quite quickly.

    I've had a couple of teeth removed from my lower jaw, and what I've found is that over time the rest move to almost fill the gaps. I'll never have compacted wisdom teeth!

  13. #125
    Administrator Lex's Avatar
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    That's where they make their money. I asked about having an insert (a false tooth fixed into the jaw), and it will cost 2,000 to have it done as the procedure's not available on the NHS. My dentist didn't seem to think it was worth it anyway, as it's a back tooth, and I'm inclined to agree with her.

    All in all, I was impressed with the dentist handled things; I'll definitely be going back to her for check ups.

  14. #126
    Super Moderator rebbonk's Avatar
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    Walking the dog the last couple of mornings (7:30 ish) I've noticed it's quite chilly. I've also noticed lots of berries on the canal side trees, which I think are very early. Nasty winter on the way?

  15. #127
    Administrator Lex's Avatar
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    I've noticed the chilly mornings & ripening berries too. I'm making some carrot soup at the minute, but am thinking about doing a bit of blackberrying once I'm done.

  16. #128
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lex View Post
    I'm making some carrot soup at the minute, but am thinking about doing a bit of blackberrying once I'm done.
    Went a bit overboard with the blackberrying this evening- 1.2 kilos!

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