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View Full Version : EXPENSIVE Presents A Must Have For Kids??



cathidaw
20-12-2008, 12:52 AM
This week Iwas in Cov. market cafe and got talking as one does.--to a woman with 3 children, under7. I asked the oldest what he would like for Christmas and he reeled off a load of things.
She said she was dreading it all. Last year she borrowed 1000 for prezzies and has only paid offjust over half. "Well" she said, "you've got to ,havent you-- cant spoil it for the children can you?" She has taken out loan for this year and did not mind telling a total stranger-me -her problems. Her husband cant' get a job -has never had one so they are on benefits.
Iasked her how she would ever manage to pay it back .She just shrugged and said "something will come up-perhaps we'll win the lottery-ha-haa"
Cynical me thought yes- the state (meaning us and our money) will sort it out and get them out of a mess.
We cannot blame the children if they want the moon when they have been brought up to expect it.
50 years ago we didn't have much and life was sometimes grim, And so-- as we have got a bit better off have indulged the children by giving them what we didn't have. But it has gone too far now-Icant think what will happen when the banks stop lending altogether to people on benefits--and how those kids will react. They'll grow up with a bigger chip than their parents.

Shizara
20-12-2008, 02:13 PM
Whilst we can't turn back the clock I too remember a time when there wasn't so much to go around. My mother made all of our clothes, my Dad was very much a handyman. He did all the household maintenance including drainage, laying field tiles, roofing, fencing, you name it he did it. Otherwise you needed to pay a tradesman rather a lot of money.

I seem to remember my cycle was a secondhand purchase that he bought for very little money. He completely stripped the bike, spray painted, added new decals, brakes, cables, tyres etc and it was as good as a new one.

When it came to Christmas presents we never, ever asked for the sun, the moon and the stars. Mum would take in some work at home making ballet shoes and the money from that would go towards Christmas presents. One year my sister and I received dolls prams. My Nana made satin pillow shams and covers for the prams as our Christmas presents and old blankets were cut down into dolls pram size and finished off neatly.

Christmas was never about blowing the family budget to smithereens, it was about giving what we could, what could be afforded and appreciating what we had. We also knew the meaning of the word "NO" and didn't try and emotionally blackmail parents into providing a want that really couldn't be afforded.

Perhaps it is time to reflect on days gone by and see what we can learn from the more prudent, thrifty behaviour of our parents and grandparents of yesteryear.

jaz08
11-02-2009, 11:20 AM
Give what you can afford. And also try think if the kid is responsible enough to handle and be given that expensive gift.

cathidaw
12-02-2009, 01:02 AM
I think what I wastrying to say was that these children may use the expensive gifts responsibly but when the next new 'toy ' comes along they expect to have it even though the parents can't afford it. Some parents can't say no, so their kids grow up expecting the moon as a 'right.'

Gladys
12-02-2009, 05:06 PM
I'm with you all on this. I was brought up not to expect, so that when something is given no matter how small, large, cheap or expensive, it is the thought behind it that counts. The thought is the crux of the matter, the meaning of the gift and the reason for it. Unfortunately, alot of people have forgotten this and have raced on for the material values, Instilling this in thier offspring. This seems to have taken on competitive features in a 'keep up with the Jones' type of thing. If they've got one, I have to as well or mine is better still. Children do it all the time with toys, clothes,trainers etc and there's peer pressure to conform which makes life even harder for parents who do try to say 'no'. What we can do about it, I do not know except that with the credit crunch, no will be no but for the wrong reasons. :)

cathidaw
13-02-2009, 12:09 AM
I am hoping that the 'credit crunch' brings people down to earth a bit, and perhaps parents will just have to say 'no', although I dont think it will work for a lot of parents. They too have been brought up to have everything as a 'right'
so their kids have no chance of learning any difference-unless things get so bad that everyone is in the same boat and they realise that the money is simply not there for all the new gadgets and designer stuff.
Apparently the charity shops are on a roll at the moment, but some will shoot themselves in the feet as many of the prices are more expensive that the shops with all the permanent sales now on.
I took some stuff to a charity shop after Christmas and was surprised at the prices they put on them.